Asphyxiate
by Ahgayle
Summary: Monsters live inside all of us but how long can you hold them in until they spill out destroying everything? Lets find out. Coming of age fiction about Danny and his demons, can he be saved? Can he stop? What is he doesn't want to.. some people are too perfect
1. Chapter 1

Texas sunsets are something all their own. The way the colors mix, dancing into each other creating breathtaking shades of tangerine and violet it never gets old to me. The hum of my mustang's engine brings me back to reality and the fact I've been sitting waiting for Melodie to come outside for a soild 10 minutes.

" _Women.."_ I sigh. Mel always takes all the air from a room before exiting, though I'm sure it's all in good spirits we need her dad to believe we're just going to work on college applications and totally not sneaking into emo night downtown. Not that this is the first or last time.

My passenger door opens and staring back with amber eyes is my favorite scorpio. She smiles, there's lipstick on her teeth, I chuckle.

" _What bitch ass, lets go before my dad starts checking on us."_

" _What? He still worried we're secretly dating?"_

We both laugh, not that nothing's never happened just a kiss or two but Mel isn't my type and she's too precious to waste a fuck on.

" _Nah, but really learn to stop getting lipstick on your teeth"_

She slams the mirror down and starts using her finger to rub off her teeth while I start heading out of Brookshire and into Houston. Doors open at 9 but we always fill up on trash food before the vodka assaults our insides.

We arrived at 8:45 no line yet, which is fine we prefer blending in among the actual of age emo kids. This entire scene is both a hilarious joke and a close knit family. Barb's downtown hosts this night every 1st Tuesday of the month and it's solely dedicated to late 90' early 2000's alternative music. It's honestly great, we always have a great time and it's brought out my love for vodka cranberries. Only downside is it's a 21+ event so Mel made us fake IDs, god bless that crafty bitch.

It's 9:03 there's a decent amount of kids now so we get into line. We blend in easy with the group in front of us, typical attire- Black skinnies, worn in slipknot shirt, and converse for me. Ripped black skinnies, new My Chemical Romance shirt Mel got for her birthday and vans. Her icy blonde hair is curled tonight, it's "her new thing" meanwhile a beanie suffices to keep my mud brown hair out of my way. A girl ahead of us looks back and our eyes catch, her eyes show excitement but nerves it's probably her first time.

* _The Middle by Jimmy Eats World plays loudly*_

" _Drinkssssssssssss"_ Mel drags me to the corner bar, Ali is running it tonight thank god. She's been my favorite bartender here super sweet girl and the one who got me hooked on that damn vodka cranberry. She smiles as we approach the lights from the stage turning her into a red beacon.

" _Vodka Cranberry and a double shot pineapple and rum?"_ She leans over the counter so we aren't screaming into eachothers face. We both nod, smiles far too large, but I've been waiting for tonight all month. I needed this.

Drinks in hand we head to the second floor, Mel's favorite because the floor lights up different colors with the music. _*I'm not Okay by MCR starts playing*_ She screams. Her favorite band. Another squeal and I see the girl from outside singing her lungs out a drink in each hand. Both hers? Or did she steal from a friend in her group? Either way props to her for embracing this.

 _Slipppgggrrrrugggg_

1 down. Who knows how many more to go.

Mel is hanging on Ali at this point both laughing just enjoying the music. I'm only 3 drinks deep, just enough to numb myself and start feeling the music. Fresh girl (I've come to call her that) has drank more than me or any of her friends for that matter but I can't take my eyes of her. She's perfect, you can tell she takes care of herself, her red hair keeps flailing everything- she gestures outsides with a cigarette in her hand but she still heads out alone. Perfect.

11:24 It's crisp outside as I step onto the deck, she's standing at the rail digging for a lighter as I walk over.

" _Here"_ I hand her my bic, her glazed eyes meet mine and she smiles ear to ear, oh yes this is perfect.

" _Wow, thank you. I guess chivalry isn't dead"_ She laughs too loudly at her "classic" joke.

I smile.

" _I saw you in line with your girlfriend"_

" _She's not my girlfriend"_ I'm annoyed. Mel is Mel and nothing more for fucks sake.

" _Yeah well that sucks y'all are both hot. But i'm trashed so i could be lying"_ No filter, perfect.

She drunk chit chats while we start walking down the stairs to the parking lot and down San Jacinto St, she's from Katy currently in school at the university of Boulder, CO, she came back home to meet her niece who was born saturday, not that I care. We're walking past an automotive shop when I push her into the alley against the wall and my lips meet hers.

First she's stiff- questioning herself and I, but she softens and melts into my chest and my mouth. Letting me guide her down the alley deeper and deeper until she hits the very back wall. My hands running down to the hem of her shirt then inside. She's cold, her nipples can't hide that, I'm twisting and teasing enjoying the little sighs and moans that escape her red lips. She starts fumbling with my belt, I push her hands away. Oh, honey that's not where this is going sadly.

My hands grip around her throat- her eyes widen looking into mine, she's trying to fight, trying to kick and scratch but she's too weak. Gotta love alcohol. My hands grip tighter digging into her skin forcing her slighly off the ground. The life is fading from her eyes quickly now, she's not fighting anymore. As her eyes empty a shiver runs through my body, like an electric shock but it feels fantastic. I drop her to the ground, she was perfect. I pull off her jewelry, take her wallet, and toss her into the dumpster. "Goodnight- Addison" I toss her shit in separate dumpsters and sewer openings on my way back to Barb's.

It's 12:15 by the time I step back into the bar I was only gone long enough that Mel is sitting behind the bar basically asleep but not noticed I was gone. Ali helps her up and I take over carrying her to my car and getting her buckled in, bucket at her feet just in case. Can't ruin the interior.

Another wonderful emo night, for both Mel and I.


	2. Chapter 2

_Moonlight blankets her in a blue hue, eyes still open still frozen, her soft mouth slightly gaping. I can't stop staring at her pale skin, she looks like a mannequin but better- she's_ _ **real**_ _._

" _The sun is shining right in my damn eyes"_ Mel grunts pulling my curtains closed. I take a deep breath calming myself from my dream, I'll never forget her eyes. I look over to Mel why can't I feel this way towards someone like her. Someone strong, independent, rough, imperfect, but she's still beautiful. She's a real human. Not Plastic. I check my phone. Typical social media bullshit.

 _Instagram Alicatttt tagged you in a photo_

 _Instagram M3rmaidMel0die tagged you in a photo_

 _Instagram +6 new follow requests_

 _Mom: Hope you're having fun at Mel's! Dad and I are going to bed early see you in the evening baby boy33_

 _Mr. Duggar: Mel's cell is off. Is she okay? Y'all probably just fell asleep… check in when you can asap plz_

 _Facebook +10 notifications_

 _Timehop WOW YOU WON'T BELIEVE TODAY ABE HAS SOMETHING SPECIAL 7 YEARS AGO_

Nothing on the news about Addison, no mention of anything related to emo night. Good.

I throw the comforter off me and stretch my arms heading towards the bathroom. First things first- toss clothes into laundry, middle of the pile so mom won't question any alcohol smells, brush teeth, now shower. The water is hot and it's melting off last night from my body, pushing her to the back of my mind only to come back in my dreams. I don't regret anything, this wasn't the first time and I don't see it being the last.

After my shower I head downstairs straight for the coffee aka my life line. While my keurig is starting up and making my cafe mocha I toss a breakfast sandwich in. I spend whatever is left of the morning both on my phone mindlessly scrolling or watching snapchats and half ass some siege. By the time Mel wanders down half dressed no pants, hair sticking up everywhere, and looking like a joker wanna be with her lipstick. Before I can start to tease her she holds up 1 finger to halt me.

" _Coffee and silence or death."_

I roll my eyes while she sits on the couch taking my controler and saving my team, I go and make her grumpy ass her favorite coffee this freeze dried crap my dad brought her back from Puerto Rico. She likes it basically black and strong enough to wake the dead and that's exactly what this shit tastes like _dead_.

By 4 Mel's dad came and got her something about family time and going to see the new Thor more. My Mom and Dad arrive home, dad starts cooking joking about teaching me a thing or two except we both know he won't after I burnt his steak last time. My mom on the other hand comes and sits down with me while I'm filling out college applicatons.

" _Wow.. look at this spread honey! A &M, University of Texas Austin, University of Houston, Auburn, University of Boulder… Those are new, I thought you wanted to stay in state honey?"_

" _I do mom, it's just in case ya know."_ Pfft with my GPA/SAT/ACT and being the top in my class I know I can go anywhere I want it's just a matter of Mel. I won't leave her alone.

" _Oh honey! You can go anywhere you want and I'll support you wherever you decide."_

" _Thanks Mom."_

Would you still love me knowing your only son is a murder? Would you still support me knowing my college decision was being based on where my barely passing best friend would get in? Stop. I can't fall into this hole.

My parents are 2 engineers working for BP they're stupid smart and stupid in love even after 20 years yet out of all the possible kids they could've had they got a psychopath who gets off on people dying because humans are fucking horrible creatures who do nothing but tear others down to build themselves up. Through all the classical piano training, swim lessons, soccer, football, top gym memberships, a 1969 shelby mustang, all that's ever eaten me alive was why my piano teacher kept sleeping with Mel's Mom causing her parents to split and her mom to fucking abandon her own daughter. Why did my coaches stare too long and touch too specifically on the weaker boys who instead of screaming out just stayed silent and left the teams. Why did my parents think physical skills could be bought when under their nose they were making me strong enough for another kind of sport.

No. It's not their fault. They tried to set me up for success and _I'm_ the one setting myself up for failure.

It's 9 when my door swings open " _OHMYGAWDDDD Thor was sooo good we need to go see it after jigsaw"_

" _I'm sorry did we have plans?"_

Mel rolls her eyes and pushes my face. I snicker. _"College apps my dude, you know I need help"_

" _Yeah, I've made a list of the bigger universities you can get into with the scholarships you're up for that I also wouldn't mind attending."_

" _You don't have to waste your future Danny, you actually have skills and smarts. You can make something of yourself like your parents."_

" _What's the point of making something of just myself when I can help make something of you also?"_ I'm not a completely heartless bastard come on. She smiles and hugs me. I know she needs me, and I know she knows I need her also. We grew up together, we're neighbors until her parents split but her dad still made it a point for us to grow up together. Probably helps her dad and my dad are best bros for life thought but I'll take it.

It's well after midnight when Mel leaves and my house is quiet. I sneak out my backdoor and go into my shed. It used to be my dads but he's not as into power tools as I am. I pull my tin superman out from it's little hiding place and take Addison's school ID out. I caress her face. Her eyes in the photo replaced with her frozen ones. I take a breath centering myself again and put my tin away, can't spend too much time remembering I do have school tomorrow.


End file.
